I used to feel like I lived at the hospital
Last Friday we had to visit the children’s assessment Center, it’s the place that grounds me ,it’s where it all began our journey ,and we spent three years visiting, it holds a very special place in our hearts and although Oscar was mostly crying!!!! as we got out of the car he said friends❤️ , it’s the the place we first were assessed and diagnosed , the place where we were given a family support worker , the place where we were advised it’s best to place our child in the therapeutic nursery there within the hospital , actually in the same place along the hall from the consultants ,and having two kids before it was alien to me ,a far cry from what I envisaged a nursery to be , it was a hospital room with a high ratio of amazing nursery staff, consultants and therapists on tap , we soon adjusted and I would drop him off for his two hours and sit outside in the car , on arrival I would wheel him in and he would silent cry as they wheeled him away , which considering he wasn’t even two yet broke my heart ,but as I got to know the ladies and as Oscar adjusted a little I started to enjoy the break, and use it to recharge my battery’s , I used to shut off emotionally not allow myself to even think about what he was doing in there as I knew he was safe , but it was silent torment of a mum knowing it was best, but broken to at the thought of what was to come , forced help!
But as the time went on I started to realise they knew what I faced ,and they knew that he must adapt and adjust now ,in the earlier years in order to ever transition to ever transition to school full time , as they had seen it all before , in the early days oscar would cry on the way in and again on the way out , but he started to make progress after a year , he was lucky enough to have two years in honey bears therapeutic unit and built some real attachments to the children and staff , on the day he left I had a hole in my heart , they were my comfort blanket, he left there having met his two year goal to tolerate people near him! It took two years !!!!!and he was willingly walking in holding a hand and saying goodbye to me happily going by the end, which set him up to the preschool nursery also in the hospital this was for one year we had to build new relationships and I felt so worried that summer , the beauty of the preschool was he stayed with the 6 other children he knew so although adults were new ,there were some comforts in the room , in true Oscar style he had his moments but would go in willingly and I feel he did feel safe there, again high ratio of experienced staff , by this point two years in I found myself comforting other parents in the waiting room about to hand babies over, and giving them the comfort I was given by parents before me ,but it was a journey Oscar and I took together ,and I treasure it , our time ,the journey for him was huge he transitioned from nursery to preschool and integrated to mainstream nursery ,then into school actual school , a special needs school linked to the specialist nursery that his mainstream nursery helped with the assessment and his EHCP plan , again they were a huge support and continue in his life .
This gave oscar the best start to his education with supports in place at a special school to support his needs ,and I’m forever grateful, when he left I bought them all a poppy broach not to forget him , I like to leave doors open ,I’m pretty sure most SEN parents feel the same, these amazing people that imprint so early on to your child and family will be remembered by me forever , I go back , I visit, I donate old toys , I hug them when I see them, they are family to Oscar, as with special needs you need to build your family early , there your army 💙💙💙💙
April Childs my support worker kept Oscar on her caseload and checks on us regularly I still call on her if I need too💙💙
Going back to the hospital opened up some old wounds as to how vulnerable we both were at that time, comparing to now , and how alone we really were at the start, but I left just feeling so grateful for that place oscar calls friends , what would we ever do without them 💙